When my oldest son was little, the VeggieTales were starting to become a thing. He loved watching the VeggieTales. He loved reading books with the VeggieTales. He even loved playing make-believe with the VeggieTales. My husband and I still quote some of the VeggieTales books and movies twenty-one years later because we read or watched them no less than 1,276,952 times each! Kids love predictability and repetition.
Establishing a rhythm in our home is so valuable when our children are young. It helps them know what is coming and gives us opportunities to be intentional. Children develop emotional security when their world is consistent, predictable, and nurturing. As children experience the same routines repeatedly, the brain strengthens connections that will lead to trust. In the unpredictable world we live in, predictability can be the anchor our children need to feel secure. I struggled with routine and schedules for my boys when they were young, going an entire day feeling like nothing had been accomplished. Some days were great, and some days we struggled to get anything completed. But in Deuteronomy, God gives us a plan for how to establish a rhythm for our families.
“And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your strength. And you must commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these commands that I am giving to you today. Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up.”
Deuteronomy 6:5-7, NLT
There are four specific times in the day to help establish this rhythm and point ourselves and kids towards Christ. We shared these at our most recent New Parent Class and would like to share them with you again.
1. Eating Time
As a family, sit down and have a meal. You may have heard the studies about how important dinner is to share with family. The focus is not on the food being eaten. The focus is about the opportunity to connect. At our family dinners, we would ask high/low for the day and pray together. It was our time to connect. I have a friend whose husband had unpredictable hours, so they would frequently connect over breakfast instead of dinner. There is no magical time of when to connect, just who should be involved.
2. Play Time
Kids love to use their imagination, and playtime can be a meaningful opportunity for Bible story recreation. Encourage your child to tell the stories in their own words so that you can hear what they understand. Your child can become a hero and rescue others. You can role-play how to deal with conflict, and if there are friends or siblings around, you will be modeling how to deal with disagreements. It is an intentional time to talk about sin and making choices.
3. Travel Time
As your kids get older travel time is so very precious. I loved driving my kids to their activities because they were a captive audience in my vehicle. Sometimes we would sing worship songs at the top of our lungs. Sometimes we would talk about how things were going with their friends or their brothers. And sometimes, we would sit in silence and allow whatever needed to bubble to the surface to come up. Sitting shoulder to shoulder in the car, not eye to eye, allowed my boys to share more vulnerable things. As they continued to get older during travel time, we would have the hard conversations like handling peer pressure or how to stand up for someone who is being teased. We would talk through different scenarios to help them determine their best decision.
Another of point of connection while driving during travel time, when your kids are young and point out the things that God created, talk about how God is our Holy Creator. Continue making every effort to stay connected, looking at each moment as an opportunity to relate your God and family, such as praying for the ambulance that passes you on the road. It is tempting to put on your favorite radio station or put on a movie in the car to keep the kids quiet, but work for the connection when they are young, so they don’t check out on their electronic devices when they get older.
4. Bedtime
When my kids were little, this is one of my favorite times because I had one on one time with each child that was precious and hard to find during other times of the day. We would talk about their day and pray together. We would read a Bible story or three. Kids are more willing to share what is on their hearts; especially, if they think it will mean staying up past bedtime! Missing that, I wish I had continued to tuck my kids in even when they were older to have that time of connection and conversation. Protect against the hustle and bustle of your day robbing you of this precious time with your children.
Bonus Suggestion
As your kids are heading out the door to school, whether it is preschool or high school, I encourage you to pray a blessing out loud over your children. I regret not praying out loud over my children when they were younger. I feel awkward now trying to start something new, even though my heart is genuine. If praying out loud over your children becomes part of your routine early in life, then your kids will expect it and maybe even ask for it.
By creating a rhythm in a chaotic day, I found I was intentional with my kids and my relationship with the Lord was in a better place. As you look for God’s fingerprints in everything you are doing, take time to make connections and you will reap a harvest.
