In part two of our Parenting Pathway Podcast series on mentoring, Pastors Dave Carl and Steve Fischer talk about what it looks like to be a mentor and a mentee. We at Stonebriar strongly believe that spiritual growth is best achieved through the guidance and encouragement of fellow believers. The intimacy that develops in a mentor/mentee relationship is the best path to promoting spiritual development.
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Dr. Howard Hendricks, a long-time mentor and friend of Senior Pastor Chuck Swindoll, said that every Christian needs at least three individuals in his or her life: We need someone who has come before us, who mentors us; we need another beside us, who shares our burden; and we need someone beyond us whom we’re mentoring. Otherwise, we grow stagnant.1
As you think about a mentor for your own life or your children’s lives, it can be intimidating or even scary to discern who to pursue and what to look for. Ultimately, in the lives of our children, we want to wholly trust the person we are allowing to have such an influence on our kids.
What should I look for in a Mentor?
Look for someone who . . .
- Is in daily and close contact with the Holy Spirit.
- Has a mentor themselves.
- Has a love for God and is pursuing Christ in every part of their life.
- Exhibits the vulnerability to share with others what is really inside of them.
What should I expect from a Mentor?
- Coaching Mentors take a tactical approach to life’s challenges. They are great resources when you or your children are reaching for the next developmental milestone or achieving the next goal.
- Counseling Mentors tend to be the people you seek in times of stress or trouble. They listen with interest and provide support and problem-solving.
- Spiritual Friends walk through faith and life challenges together. They lift you up in prayer, seek God’s guidance through Scripture, and encourage you to grow spiritually.
- Spiritual Directors help you move toward God. They challenge your base of knowledge and experience with God and help you move forward in your spiritual development.
In all these relationships, there is a constant awareness of God’s presence in the lives of both the mentor and mentee. As you seek to bring mentors into your child’s life, look to the community that is around you in your church and your community group, as well as Christian friends and family members. And be sure to listen to Part 1, The Value of a Mentor To Our Kids, to gain more insight into your next steps.
- Quote from Insight for Living article, The Enduring Value of a Mentor
