Four Ways to Reset Your Family

We are one week into the new year, the kids are back at school, most of us are back to work, and if I am honest, a little funk has set in. I am enough of a realist to know that we would not wake up on January 1, 2021, and all of 2020 would be behind us. But there is a little bit of me that is disappointed life is pretty much the same. I admit I have been in a bit of a holding pattern, waiting until things returned to “normal,” knowing that intellectually life will never be like it was before. Our family seems stuck. We have quit talking so much about the future. We have not planned a family vacation. We did not even set goals for the new year.

So, how do we move forward? How do we find the strength to lead our families well? How do we set a foundation for our family when the world seems in so much chaos? And, how do we raise our kids to be adults when the future seems so uncertain?

The book of Philippians gives timely advice and perspective on life’s bumps and bruises. When writing to the church in Philippi, Paul is joyful even while being under house arrest in Rome. He reminds believers that we never suffer alone, but that contentment can be found in the presence of Christ, even bringing joy in the midst of all that is going on around us.

Not that I speak from want, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.

Philippians 4:11-13

As parents, it is time to step forward, lead our families, foster resilience in our children, and take each challenge and point our families to our Savior. These are foundational strategies we might have lost sight of while waiting for “normal” to return.

Four Ideas to Move Forward

1. Establish routines.

Before 2020 most of our lives ran on pretty predictable routines and schedules. Kids went to school while we went about working and caring for our families, planned activities, participated in group activities, and planned family vacations. One of the most significant losses most of us suffered was the complete disruption of our life rhythm. Instead of waiting for life to return to normal, it is time to establish new routines for you and your family. For example, on Tuesday nights, we always had dinner together at the table, now we have gotten into the habit of nightly dinner and a movie.

2. Engage everyone in the operation of the family.

Part of establishing a routine is to also engage all the members of the family in the weekly operations of home and family. Functions of the home can include how you clean your home, cook and prepare meals, do laundry, shop for groceries, or care for pets, etc. If you have not established regular chores and responsibilities, this is an excellent time to bring in structure. These are things that need to happen regardless of what is going on outside the home. Focus on the Family has a great resource for determining age-appropriate chores for your kids.

3. Focus on life skills.

Every parent of a teenager has those moments of cold fear when we realize we have missed a major or minor life lesson. These can be big things such as how to balance their bank account to simple things like addressing an envelope. A couple of summers ago, I wrote a blog post about life lessons we all need to teach our kids, Ten Life Skills We Need To Teach Our Kids Before Next Summer.

4. Keep God at the center of your family.

We are out of the habit of going to church, and we are out of the practice of participating in Zoom groups with fellow believers. You might have given up on the dinner time devotionals, and bedtime Bible stories might have given way to other routines. However, when your family participates in corporate worship and Bible study, there is nothing more important than to model turning to Christ in this season.

So, as we mourn a bit of what we have lost, it is time to reset the foundation of our homes and families.

Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 3:13-14

Author

  • Christine Clark

    Christine Clark is the Ministry Leader for Family Ministries at Stonebriar Community Church. She has a passion for supporting parents and helping them gain confidence and tools to be spiritual leaders in their homes. She is blessed to be the mom of a one son and the wife of her college sweetheart for 25 years. She and her husband are finding their way as empty nesters, and enjoying the new found freedom that comes with this stage of life. She is also an avid sports fan who loves all things NASCAR and football, especially in the fall in Texas.

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