Over Thanksgiving break, I read the following statistics in the weekly Culture Translator by AXIS.org.
“According to the National Institutes of Health, nearly 1 out of every 3 adolescents between the ages of 13 and 18 will experience an anxiety disorder. Whether the culprit is social media, lack of sleep, increased scholastic pressure, or screen time, the verdict is simple: Our kids need help.”
I could not agree more. Our Family Ministries team sees teens and young kids who struggle with anxiety and depression almost every day. Our hearts break for these families as they try to navigate these waters and find the right support, help, and encouragement.
The same article pointed out that there is emerging evidence that reveals an organic way to combat anxiety and depression: gratitude. According to author Jerusha Clark, “Gratitude and anxiety are mutually exclusive neural pathways. You physiologically cannot be grateful and anxious at the same time.”
I don’t know why we find this solution surprising. After all, the Bible has told us this fact.
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:6-7)
But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. (1 Corinthians 15:57)
Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. (Colossians 3:15)
If gratitude is the source of much healing and living a life with less anxiety, then we need to teach our kids how to approach life with a heart of gratitude. How do we teach our kids to be grateful?
- Model a heart of gratitude. Are you grateful for all that God has provided, or are you focused on what you think you need? Our kids are watching how we live our lives. Most counselors will start therapy with understanding more about your family of origin; they are looking for learned behaviors as a result of the family you were raised in. Our kids will use our behaviors to form their own response to the world.
- Pay attention to your life. It seems simplistic to thank God for the blue sky and bright sun. After all, that was how we first taught our kids about the presence of God in the universe. But we should start by being fully present in every single moment of the day, remembering to be grateful for even the simplest things. Being grateful in the small things develops a pattern of gratitude.
- It’s muscle memory. When a golfer is playing a round of golf, he is focused on repeating the same motion with every swing. Repeating the same motion develops the consistency in his game he needs to be successful. Developing a life filled with gratitude is much the same. Returning to grateful awareness repeatedly as you and your children face nervous situations develops the gratitude muscles and skills necessary for life.
Ideas to help you and your family with gratitude training:
- Scripture Memory. There are lots of tools and apps to help you and your family bring the practice of Scripture memory to life. I personally have found tools like temporary tattoos and keychain tabs helpful in bringing Scripture to my daily life.
- Gratitude Journal. Our kids are not likely to sit with a pen and pretty journal, but they will download and use an app such as My Gratitude Journal to help them track things they’re grateful for every day. With most of these apps, users will get reminders and rewards to help create a journaling habit.
- Practice Kindness. Make a practice of telling your kids what you value about them and how much you love them. Also, look for ways to serve your community, providing a very tangible reminder to your family of all you have to be thankful for.
As you and your family celebrate this holiday season, remember to take a few minutes each day to practice gratefulness and kindness.
