Find Your Family’s Unique Rhythm

“Rhythm is embedded in our bodies and in our world.”
Eugene Peterson

Ebb . . . flow.
Sunrise . . . sunset.

Autumn . . . winter . . .
spring . . . summer.

Sleeping . . . waking.

Working . . . resting.

An old man, full of years,
the hope of eternity in his eyes,
breathes his last . . .

A tiny baby, all her days ahead,
a memory of Heaven in her eyes,
breathes her first.

A breath in . . . a breath out.

Life is rhythms. God has filled all of life with rhythms.

Family life, too, is made of rhythms, and with the rhythms come rituals and traditions—created by each family to observe and celebrate the events of life and the passage of time. Whether created purposely or by chance, they become part of the family. Some families rise early, others stay up late. Some families are loud, while others are more quiet.

What feelings stir in you as you think of your family rhythms, family rituals, and family traditions? Breathe in . . . breathe out. Sit with the question for a moment.

Think about the rhythms of weekdays and the rhythms of weekends.

Think about the rhythms of daytime—waking up, getting ready, doing the work set before us—and nighttime—getting supper, relaxing, getting ready for bed, sleeping.

Think about the rhythm of the seasons—the changing weather; the activities that go with each season; the colors of the seasons; the anticipation of something new and yet the familiarity of something we have seen before.

Think about the rhythm of holidays and birthdays and anniversaries and weddings and baptisms and funerals.

Each life is different.

Each family life is different.

The rhythms of each are different, too. Each family adds the rituals and traditions that observe and celebrate their unique family.

Each family decides what their rituals and traditions are to do.

Do they lead us to closeness as a family?

Do they help us to be thankful together?

Do they bring us as a family closer to our God?

Do they remind us of the blessings God has given us?

Do they prompt us to praise God together?

Do they lead us out into our world to be the salt and the light?

Your family’s rhythms and traditions and rituals will not be carbon copies of any other family. Your family’s rhythms and traditions and rituals may not be like those of the family in which you grew up. Your rhythms and traditions and rituals may even change as your family grows and changes, but some things will always be the same.

With some reluctance, I resist the urge to share our family rhythms and traditions and rituals with you. I resist it because God made you with the natural tendency to create. But stop for a minute and think—How you start your day? Do you pray together as a family? Do you share a blessing as everyone walks out the door? Think for a minute about how you celebrate milestones such as birthdays and anniversaries. Do you look for God’s provision with the passage of time? Do you journal about God’s faithfulness through another year? Think about holidays—How do you celebrate them? Do you feel the need to change your approach to them?

You get to create the traditions and rituals that fit the rhythms of your family that also point to God. Reminders of the presence of God in our homes should be as common as the air we breathe.

“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”

Matthew 11:28-30, The Message

So . . . breathe in and breathe out. Consider your family rhythms. Consider the rituals and traditions you already have in place. Are they helping to grow your family in Christlikeness? Then hold on to them!

Now consider the rituals and traditions that you can experiment with. What might a new ritual or tradition help you to observe or celebrate, while pointing to Christ?

Most important of all in your considerations, take your questions and wonderings about family rhythms to your Father, who wants to breathe life-giving ideas all over your family. Take the time to sit with Him, to be still, to rest.

Breathe in and breathe out, and enjoy the unique patterns of your family that you create together.

You can read more about growing your own family rhythm, rituals, and traditions here on Parenting Pathway by reading:

Making Room In Our Home and Our Hearts

Author

  • Barbara and Jim Deatherage

    Barbara Deatherage is the Elementary Ministry Leader at Stonebriar Community Church. At nineteen, her life completely changed when she met Jesus Christ and accepted Him as her Savior. Three days later, she met Jim Deatherage who would become her husband. Barbara went from rebellious college girl to pastor’s wife in a very short amount of time. Several moves took them from Pennsylvania to Maryland to Virginia to North Carolina to Kansas and finally to the North Texas area where they live now. Also, along the way, Barbara and Jim became mom and dad to four children: Rachael, Caleb, Melody, and Evan. Their kids are growing up, but that means the blessing of five grandkids. What fun!

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